a selina

2014-06-28 - 19-24-37-2

after the dream I’m distracted, scanning crowds
strange perspective of a dream is similar to how we feel when passing strangers in the street
however spacially close, there is an unknown distance between us
hoping to recognise her before I forget her face
in dream words melt
(as does separation)
(to explain: closeness and distance, they melt like wax)
with each repetition of simple scenes
repeating, uncovering the smallest detail, again and again
to make the slightest thing more elegant, more precise?
(hoping for the tiny detail that will explain it all)

clarity is momentary
what does she say? where do thoughts come from and go to?
I think she knows something,
but her thoughts are like wishes also
(perhaps she is dreaming too;
our dreams are just briefly overlapping like translucent sheets)

ghost pass through us all the time
like subatomic particles which only rarely hit one of our particles
(from their perspective, we are only slightly less empty than the night air)

we make ghosts

as some stones crumble under the weight of the stones they support
eventually new stones appear to replace them
a wall of memories

a wall being built with every thought
(even dream thoughts)

in this space behind closed eyes
I recall it all like I would remember taking a photograph
(a strange feeling)
I felt absolutely certain, momentarily
but for now all that has substance are these words
which soon will be all that is left of our meeting and glances

a memory of memories
layers, sediments, residues: fossils
the existence of life in thoughts
(the Others that intersect with Not-Other – how is it possible to differentiate between what is real and what is not – what is constructed and what is elemental?)
is Selina’s face a construct, a composite?
where did her black dress and eyes come from?
(the dream was monochrome)
also her voice: I heard her speaking to me but can’t describe the sounds nor remember the words
words without structure or content but containing a message nonetheless
an implication
walking along a street
a door opens
(She is opening the door from the inside)

apart from these necessary details
(and Others, whose importance is implied in all this, but to no small concern as the scenes play out in cinematic repetition, are mostly disregarded)
everything else is a non-existence, a grey fog
(a blur)
and then it ends

there are no more details, everything that is able to be unhidden has been released
the fog is thickening
in the forest, everything goes back to sleep
where do they dream?